The time in-between 中间时期
(Some considerations on adolescence)(关于青春期的一些思考)
作者:法国分析家Magnolia Chiang-Laluc
翻译:张宜宏
2008年中国青少年心理健康论坛讲座文字资料
Part One 第一部分
1. Adolescence is a stage of life, a “space between two times”, a period of transition which the subject can explore only after experiencing it. This period is a time when a girl or boy moves away from, indeed rejects, childhood and moves towards a new vague place, hard to get hold of. Here we will consider adolescence, not only in relation to our clinical work and as a period of life; we also need to talk about the psychical processes that take place during this time and relate them to a social and cultural framework. An examination of adolescence must place it in its familial and political context. The adolescent is at one with the social surrounding that shapes his/her subjectivity.
青春期是生命的一个阶段,一个“在两个时期之间的空间”,一个过渡时期,主体只有在经历这个时期之后才能探索这一过渡阶段。这一阶段是一个男孩或女孩真正抛弃童年并朝向一个新的模糊空间移动的时期,很难去把握。这里我们不仅会在跟我们临床工作的关系中考虑青春期,将它看成生活的一个时期;我们也需要论及在这一时期发生的心理过程,并将它们同社会和文化框架联系起来。对青春期的考察必须将其放在家庭和政治背景之中。青少年是处在塑造其主体性的社会环境中。
2. Everything is possible during this time of life; the best as much as the worst. In his article “Some reflections on schoolboy psychology”, Freud emphasized that the fall of this first ideal figure, father, begins in adolescence “From his nursery the boy begins to cast his eyes upon the world outside. And he cannot fail now to make discoveries which undermine his original high opinion of his father”. The “worst” can contaminate the necessary mourning of this first ideal. I would like to quote a French psychoanalyst: “The mourning for the father corresponds, in adolescence, to the mourning of the omnipotence of mother during infancy.” Father’s symbolic murder is a necessary condition for the arrival of adolescence; the adolescent will remain at a difficult threshold if he cannot cross this pass. The task of mourning cannot be accomplished without reference to the Oedipus.
在生命的这一时期一切都有可能;好事和坏事一样多的发生。弗洛伊德在他的文章“关于男学生心理学的一些反思”中,强调:父亲这一最初理想人物的倒下开始于青春期:“男孩打从在育婴室里就开始将目光投向外部世界”。最“坏”的象水一样泛滥,对这一最初理想的必要哀悼就不能发生。我愿意引用法国精神分析师的话:“青春期对父亲的哀悼,对应于婴儿期对母亲全能的哀悼。”父亲的象征性谋杀是青春期到来的一个必要条件;青少年假如不能跨越这一难关,他将会保持在一个困难处境。不提到俄狄浦斯,哀悼的任务不可能实现。
3. The adolescent questions his origins and his birth; in the search for his identity, he will interrogate the world around him. At the same time, he will be forced to choose and anticipate his involvement in life.
青少年对他的起源和出生质疑;在对同一性的寻求中,他会质问周围的世界。与此同时,他会被迫选择并预期生活中牵连的事物。
4. His parentage and his origins determine this process. Human beings do not emerge out of nothing, separate from past and present endeavours. In this adventure, parents themselves are frequently helpless. They are pushed to take stock of their own life. They do not know how to answer to the questions they are confronted with. They are teased in areas where old wounds are just waiting to be reopened. They are exposed to their own contradictions, robbed of the ideals of their youth. They are frequently cornered into defensive and even attacking strategies, as when we attack in self-defence. Many parents act and re-act as their own parents did, even if twenty years ago they swore never to be like them. This upheaval brought about by their child’s adolescence can also be an opportunity to revisit a past partially tucked away, to open again some doors. This enables their adolescent child to gain access to his own legacy.
他的出身和血统决定这一过程。人类不是无中生有地出现而脱离过去和现在的努力。在这一冒险中,父母自身往往是无助的。他们被迫对他们自己的生活作出判断。他们不知道如何回答他们面临的问题。他们在旧伤口刚刚正等候着被重新打开的领域受到戏弄。他们接触到他们自身的矛盾,被夺走他们青春时代的理想。他们频繁陷入防御性甚至攻击性的策略,如同我们用自身防御进攻时那样。许多父母的反应和回应如同他们自己的父母所做的一样,即使在20年前他们发誓过从来也不会象他们。由他们孩子的青春期带来的这一剧变也可能是一个重游部分隐藏起来的过去的机会,重又打开一些门。这使得他们的青少年孩子能获得接近其自身传统的机会。
5. In our clinical work, we found that juvenile amnesia is as evident as the infantile amnesia described by Freud. What was at stake during the parents’ own adolescence, in their relation with their own parents, has almost always been tucked away. The questions and impasses of the following generation lay bare these issues again, often unknowingly. At this moment of resurgence of their own adolescence and its conflicts, the parents must work at remembering and repositioning their own issues. They have to distinguish present issues (those belonging to their adolescent child) from past issues (their own), if they are going to be able to deal appropriately with their adolescent children’s disarray.
在我们的临床工作中,我们发现青少年的记忆缺失同弗洛伊德描述的婴幼儿记忆缺失一样显著。在父母自己的青春期期间,在他们与他们自己父母的关系中利害攸关的东西,几乎总是被藏起来。下一代的问题和僵局将这些事情再次揭露,时常是不知不觉地。在他们自己的青春期及其冲突复活的这一时刻,父母必须在记忆并重新定位他们自身问题上做些工作。他们不得不区分现在的问题(那些属于他们青少年孩子的)与过去的问题(他们自己的),如果他们打算能够适当应对他们青少年孩子的混乱。
6. The adolescents’ attempt to achieve their own autonomy will unsettle even the most thoughtful and loving of parents. We cannot expect to find answers to these questions in formulas that disregard the parent-child relationship.
青少年获得他们自身自主性的努力将会搅乱哪怕最体贴和慈爱的父母。我们不可能期望用忽视父母-孩子关系的公式去找到这些问题的答案。
7. There is no school that will teach parents how to sail through this stage in the life of their child; confronted with a malaise that cannot be prevented, their only alternative is “to cope”. We may well ask: “Why?” Because our own inherited issues limit our possibilities of acting (and reacting) consciously to what is happening around us.
没有学校会教育父母如何在他们孩子的生命中顺利通过这一阶段;面临一个不可能被预防的不适,他们唯一的选择是“应对”。我们会友善地问:“为什么?”因为我们自身承受的问题限制了我们对我们周围正发生的事情作出有意识行动(和反应)的可能性。
8. How far have the parents gone in sorting out their own adolescence? Does the “adolescence crisis” in fact pertain to the parents? Some parents abandon their position as adults, only to find themselves – through their adolescent child – at the point where they remained in their own adolescence. They ask their children: “Are you going out? Do you have friends? Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend? How is that going?” In fact, they unconsciously behave as if they could re-live vicariously experiences that they regret not to be able to live anymore.
父母在清理他们自己的青春期上走了多远?“青春期危机”实际上与父母有关吗?一些父母抛弃他们作为成人的位置,只是借助他们青春期的孩子找到他们自己——就在他们在自己青春期停留的位置。他们问孩子:“你要出去吗?你有朋友吗?你有一个男朋友/女朋友?那是怎么发生的?”实际上,他们潜意识表现得仿佛他们能让那些生动体验复活,他们遗憾不再能有这些体验了。
9. The most painful experience for an adolescent is to witness his parents’ attempts to emulate his image and to compete with him. We observe a “clinginess” in their relation to the adolescent child, an attempt to reverse the aging process and to force back death by adopting a juvenile stance.
对一个青少年来说最痛苦的体验是,目击父母试图与他的形象竞争并和他竞争。我们观察到在他们同青少年孩子关系中的“粘着”,一种倒转老化过程并通过采取一个孩子气的姿态来阻止死亡的努力。
10. In turn, this immature attitude brings its own consequences: frequently, grandparents witnessing the way in which their son or daughter bring up their adolescent grandchild will make comments such as: “why do you let him/her to push you around?” These comments bring back into action the adolescent that the mother or father once was: the parent reverts to being his or her parents own child. However, grandparents can contribute to alleviating extremely fraught moments in the relation between parent and child. They can help to put the tensions between them into perspective. The adolescent is really at the centre of what brings together and separates generations, as well as of what can be passed on.
反过来,这一不成熟的态度带来其自身的后果:通常,目睹他们儿女抚养青少年孙子方式的祖父母会做一些这样的评论:“你为什么让他/她对你呼风唤雨?”这些评论将父母一度成为的青少年带回到行动中:父母回复到成为其父母自己的孩子。然而,祖父母能有助于减轻父母和孩子之间关系中极度忧虑的时刻。他们可帮助将他们之间的张力放进前景里面。青少年真正处在将几代人带到一起又加以分割的中心,也是能被传递下去的中心。
11. When the adolescent does not feel that he is in full possession of “his history”, he will plot his own stories. He knows how to stir up areas of conflict that remain unresolved in his parents’ life; he has a real ability to sense and reveal material that his parents do not feel like bringing up. He picks up on this reticence and goes about intensely interrogating and jolting his parents and the previous generation. He is known as “the upsetting one”; the more his parents consider him as insufferable, the more unbearable he becomes.
当青少年觉得他没有完全拥有“他的历史”,他会策划他自己的故事。他知道如何激起在他父母生活中仍未解决的冲突领域;他具有真实的能力感受和展现他的父母不想展示的材料。他注意到这一沉默并激烈地四处走动,质问并粗暴地突然干涉父母和前一个时代的人。他被称为“令人心烦意乱的人”;他的父母越是认为他不可忍受,他就变得越发不堪忍受。
12. If we want to “hold” this adolescent facing us, we have to start by remembering the adolescent that we once were.
如果我们想要“接受”我们面前的这一青少年,我们不得不通过记起我们一度成为的青少年开始。
13. When I started working with adolescents, I asked myself the question “How am I going to ‘hold’ them?” At present, my clinical work involves sessions with babies and toddlers (0-3 years old) during the morning and with adolescents during the afternoon of the same day. This has helped to realize that the questions that parents ask themselves about their babies are not that different from the questions which parents ask themselves about their adolescent children.
当我开始同青少年的工作时,我问自己这一问题“我打算如何‘接受’他们?”现在,我的临床工作涉及到上午同0-3岁婴幼儿的谈话,以及同一天下午对青少年的会谈。这有助于认识到,父母问他们自己关于他们婴儿的问题和父母问他们自己关于他们青少年孩子的问题没有什么不同。
14. Birth is a transformation which allows the transition from foetus to infant and its further adaptation to breathing and digesting. Adolescence is also a transformation: the adolescent is again as fragile as the newly born baby. He is extremely sensitive to the glances he draws from people around him and to what he hears said about himself. When a newly born arrives, the family will have many and varied comments about the baby: “He looks like this or that person! He has the nose of this person and the eyes of this other!”. In precisely the same way, during this second period of transformation, the adolescent is deeply affected by the comments he hears made by adults and his peers.
出生是一个转化,容许从胎儿到婴儿的过渡,以及到呼吸和消化的进一步适应。青春期也是一个转化:青少年重又和新生儿一样脆弱。他对于周围人注视他的目光以及他所听到的关于他自己的内容极度敏感。当一个新生儿降临,家庭会有许多关于婴儿的不同评论:“他长得象这个或那个人!他有这个人的鼻子和另一个人的眼睛!”准确地用同样的方式,在这第二个转化阶段,青少年深深地受到他所听到的由成人和同伴所作的评论影响。
15. The young man or young woman revisits his/her early infancy very frequently, without being aware of it at all. Neither the adolescent, nor the people around him recognize this early stage: they do not remember the baby that he once was. But surely, behind the symptoms that now assume new form, there hides the little baby of long ago.
年轻人非常频繁地重游他/她的婴儿早期,一点都不用意识到这一点。青少年和他周围的人们都不认识这一早期阶段:他们不记得昔日的那个婴儿。但在如今采取新形式的症状背后,肯定隐藏着很久之前的那个小婴儿。
16. Due to an insufficiently developed language, the one-year-old baby does not have words to express what he would like to say. Likewise, the adolescent that has just undergone puberty does not have the words to express the intensity of his life experiences (his new sexual desire, his romantic inclinations). He frequently has to resort to bursts of anger or sulkiness. This makes me think of a young patient that “butts in” the adults’ conversation. Her parents do not want her interfering in these exchanges. She has her own ideas, her personal opinions, but her father cannot bear her having different opinions to his own. As happened when he was a child, he does not want to even consider the possibility that she could already have her own voice. This young girl thinks that she does not have the right to think: “My father does not ever want to be wrong” she says, and retreats to sulking, tears and depression.
由于发展不充分的语言,1岁的婴儿没有词语来表达他想要说的。同样,刚刚经历身体发育的青少年也没有词语表达他生活体验的强度(他崭新的性欲,他的浪漫倾向)。他常常不得不诉诸于愤怒的爆发或愠怒。这使我想起一个在成年人谈话中打岔的年轻病人。他的父母不想要她干涉这些交流。她有她自己的观点,她自己的意见,但她父亲不能忍受她有着与他自己不同的观点。当这一切发生在她是个孩子时,他甚至不想考虑这一可能:她已经有了她自己的声音。这个小女孩认为她没有权利思考:“我父亲从不想要出错。”她说,且又退回到生气,流泪和抑郁。
17. The young child can turn to his parents and, particularly, to his/her mother. In contrast, the adolescent is continuously trying to get rid of their presence. He wants to distance himself, just like the one-year-old toddler (around the age when he learns to walk) that does not have such an immediate need of its parents. But the adolescent feels torn; on the one side, he has the parents from which he wants to grow away, and on the other, he has the idealised parents, those he saw as reliable, confident, able to deal with any situation when he was a young child. Being an adolescent entails differentiating between himself and his parents, working through the “de-idealization” of his parents, who then become “ordinary mortals”. On the other hand, the parents must also work through a process of “de-idealization” of “their child”, that child they had dreamed of, the child on which they had projected their narcissistic image, the child whom they expected to succeed and who they were never going to loose. The difficulty for the child centres on finding the right distance: proximity is still necessary, but it becomes unbearable when it is too narrow. What the adolescent seems to want is something “not too near, but not too far”. If the parents accept this necessary distance, the young person will be able to find his own desire.
年幼的孩子可能向父母,尤其是向母亲求助。相反,青少年持续不断地设法摆脱父母的存在。他想疏远自己,就像1岁刚学走路的孩子没有这样一个对父母的即刻需要。但青少年感到不安和折磨;一方面他想与父母疏远,另一方面他有着理想化的父母,他认为他们可靠,信任,能应对他年幼时的任何情境。成为一个青少年需要区分他自己和父母,修通对父母的“去理想化”,然后父母成为“普通的凡人”。另一方面,父母也必须修通对“他们的孩子”“去理想化”的过程,那个他们曾梦想过的孩子,他们曾将自己的自恋意象投射到孩子那里,他们期望孩子成功而且从来没有打算将他们放开。对孩子来说,苦难以找到适当距离为中心:接近仍有必要,但当太狭窄时接近变得不堪忍受。青少年似乎想要的是某个“不太近也不太远”的东西。假如父母接受这一必要的距离,年轻人将能够找到他自己的欲望。
18. The ability of letting the adolescent “take distance” is linked to the trust that the parent grants him. In turn, this trust is commensurate to the trust accorded the parent in his own adolescence. Some adults are not able to acknowledge their child as a subject in his own right. Parting with this “love object” (reification of the child) is painful to them, whilst other adults are perfectly able to explore their own issues.
让青少年“采取距离”的能力同父母授予他的信任相联系。反过来,这一信任相当于父母在其自己的青春期被给予的信任。一些成年人不能将他们的孩子认可为一个有自身权利的主体。同这一“爱的客体”(孩子的物化)分开对他们来说很痛苦,而其他成年人能够极好地探索他们自身的问题。
19. The adolescent has a difficult task: he must assume a different stance than the one he had as a child. In this sense, adolescence appears to be a passing away of himself, the death of his existence as a child. The adolescent experiences the loss of the child-king he thought he was, of the omnipotent child. As we mentioned before, he is also losing the idealized parents of the Oedipal fantasies.
青少年有一个困难的任务:他必须采取一个不同于他作为孩子所具有的姿态。 在这一意义上,青春期似乎是对他自身的跨越,他作为一个孩子存在的死亡。青少年体验到孩子王的丧失,他曾认为自己是孩子王,无所不能的孩子。如同我们之前所提到的,他也在失去俄底浦斯幻想的理想化父母。
20. According to the French psychoanalyst Françoise Dolto “(with) the emergence of puberty, the subject returns to the level of structuring he had before the Oedipal crisis”. Adolescence is the disappointment of the Oedipal promise.
根据法国精神分析家Françoise Dolto所说,“随着身体发育的出现,主体回到他在俄狄浦斯危机之前的结构水平”。青春期是对俄狄浦斯誓言的失望。
21. Adolescence is a new birth. This might appear contradictory or even disturbing. In our clinical work we sometimes see young people who cannot clear the hurdle of adolescence without contemplating ideas of death. The adolescent needs to give up relating as a child and he fantasize, the death of this type of relationship as&am, p;nb, sp;a suicide. The adolescent needs somebody to talk to, somebody with whom he can bring up the question of death, somebody who is not anxious to talk about it. Among young people who actually act on their suicidal thoughts, most cases are attempts rather than successful suicides. These attempts , show that at the forefront we do not find a desire to die, but an attempt to express the provisional impossibility of existing, a way of toying with death in order to give sense and value to their life. Medicating an adolescent so as to inhibit his thoughts about suicide is over-dramatizing his intention, as if&, nbsp;the prescriber feared being the accomplice of the youth’s eventual suicide. Sometimes parents do not even want to talk about “death” or “suicide”; they fear that the mere mention of these words could act as an incitement to action.
青春期是一个新的诞生。这可能看起来矛盾甚或令人不安。在我们的临床工作中我们有时看到年轻人不仔细思考死亡的概念就不能清除青春期的障碍。青少年需要放弃作为一个孩子发生的关系,而且他将这类关系的死亡幻想为自杀。青少年需要某个人交谈,某个同他在一起能够提到死亡问题的人,某个谈论死亡时并不焦虑的人。在真正实施自杀想法的年轻人中,许多个案只是尝试而不是成功的自杀。这些尝试表明,我们在这之前没有发现一个死的欲望,而是表达存在的暂时性不可能的一个尝试,一种为了给予生命的意义和价值而玩弄死亡的方式。用药物治疗青少年以便抑制他有关自杀的想法,这是对他意图的过于戏剧化,仿佛开药者害怕成为年轻人最终自杀的帮凶。有时父母甚至不想谈论“死亡”或“自杀”;他们害怕仅仅只是提到这些词语就可能促使自杀行动的出现。
22. The difficulty with adopting a different stance than the one he had as a child rests, firstly, in the task of mourning for his childhood and of transformation of his Oedipal fantasies and, secondly, in the fear that his parents will regard this evolution as unacceptable. Accordingly, he will try to protect them or, conversely, he will refuse to give them that satisfaction.
采取一个不同于他作为一个孩子时的姿态,其困难首先在于,对童年的哀悼和其俄狄浦斯幻想进行转化的任务,其次在于这一恐惧:父母认为这一演变是不可接受的。因此,他会尽力保护他们,或者相反,他会拒绝给父母那一满足。
23. For example, school life is frequently indicative of this dynamic. An excellent student who would normally fulfill all the expectations of his parents can go through a period where he sidesteps his dedication to school life completely in order to express his desire to separate, to take a certain distance, to distinguish himself from them. This is a form of behaviour akin to opposition, an attempt at differentiation.
例如,学校生活时常表明这一动力学。一个正常满足父母所有期待的学生可能经历这样一个时期,在那里他完全躲开对学校生活的专心,是为了表达他想分离、采用一定的距离、将自己和他们加以区分的欲望。这是一个类似于对抗的行为形式,一种在分化上的尝试。
24. When this “school symptom” appears in my clinical work, I frequently ask the parents “to try to remember” what they were like at that age. Often enough, after “forgetting” their own time, it happens that either mother or father, and sometimes both parents, realize that they also had difficulties at school. Failing to recognize their own anguish, and not talking about it, intensifies their adolescent child’s symptoms.
当这一“学校症状”出现在我的临床工作中,我时常要求父母“尽量记起”他们在那个年龄的样子。往往不够的是,在“忘记”他们自己的时间之后,不是母亲就是父亲,有时父母双方都认识到他们也有学业的困难。不能辨认出他们自身的苦恼,也不谈论它,这强化了他们青春期孩子的症状。
25. Thus, “growing up” consists in the imaginary “being the death of” the preceding generation. Moreover, the word adolescence comes from the Latin “adolescere”, which means “to grow up”, “to increase in size”, “to develop”.
这样,“成长”存在于想象中前代人的“正在死亡”中。而且,青春期adolescence这个词来源于拉丁文“adolescere”,意味着“成长”,“个子长高”,“发展”。
26. Sometimes the adolescent would prefer to remain a child, because he is afraid of abandoning his parents. For instance, in the cases of anorexia nervosa, young girls, in spite of their age, do not menstruate. They keep the body of a young girl to protect themselves against a body inhabited by unacceptable and dangerous desires. The physiological and morphological changes proper to puberty such as breast enlargement, menstruation, increase in height and in weight, transform this body into a threat. At the same time, the “anorexic” girl protects the image of her parents from the ageing process. At same time, they are “nourished” and comforted by the compliments addressed to their children.
有时候青少年会情愿仍然是一个孩子,因为他害怕抛弃父母。例如,在厌食性神经症的案例中,小女孩哪怕到了该来月经的年龄也没有月经。她们保持住一个小女孩的身体,让她们自己防御一个被不可接受和危险欲望所抑制的身体。适用于青春期的生理学和形态学变化,诸如乳房增大,月经,体重和身高增加,将这一身体转化成一个威胁。与此同时,“厌食症”女孩保护父母的形象不至于加剧老化的过程,同时父母通过他们对孩子表达的赞美而受到“滋养”和安慰。
27. Thus, the situations of school failure, sickness, and depression with suicidal tendencies reveal more often than not an anxiety to protect the parent from his/her own fears, anguishes and pathologies.
这样,学业失败的情境,具有自杀倾向的疾病和抑郁出现多半是一个焦虑,保护父母免于其自身的恐惧、痛苦和病理学。
28. In my clinical work with depressed adolescents I notice that sometimes their depression is a substitute for the depression of the parent they are protecting. Having a depressed adolescent offers the parents an opportunity to dedicate themselves to the care of their child’s depression and to show a more gratifying image of themselves. So much so, that frequently the improvement in the child’s depression triggers the presentation of the parent’s depression. Frequently, when the parents are treated, the adolescents can allow themselves to heal.
在我对抑郁青少年的临床工作中,我注意到他们的抑郁有时是对他们正保护着的父母抑郁的一个替代。有一个抑郁的青少年,给父母提供一个机会,让他们自己致力于对孩子抑郁的照顾,并表现他们自身一个更令人满意的形象。以至于孩子抑郁的改善常常触发父母抑郁的出现。通常当父母得到治疗,青少年就能容许他们自己治愈。
29. Adolescence is also an age when questions about sexual identity arise. Who am I? A man? A woman? The body goes through physiological changes and the adolescent becomes potentially able to reproduce. With this transformation of the child’s body into an adult sexual body, the points of reference of the unconscious image of the body and of the body scheme – basic to the narcissist identity formed at the mirror stage – must be reassessed within the new endeavours associated with genital sexuality.
青春期也是一个关于性别认同的问题产生的年龄。我是谁?男人?女人?男孩经受生理学的改变,青少年具有潜在的生殖能力。随着这一从儿童身体到成人有性身体的转化,对身体和身体结构潜意识意象的参考标准——镜像阶段形成的自恋性认同基础——必须在与生殖性欲相关联的新的努力内部得以重新评估。
30. In his text of 1949 entitled “The mirror stage as formative of the function of the I as revealed in psychoanalytic experience”, Jacques Lacan shows that the image is the unifying agent in the shaping of the desiring subject. The presence of the primordial Other (in this case, the mother) is fundamental to this moment. Lacan shows that, at the moment when the baby, in his mother’s arms, recognizes himself in the mirror, he turns around to gaze at the reflected environment and displays his jubilation. This jouissance has its origin in the external nature of the unity that the child perceives. ”The child finds, in the discourse (speech, communication) of the Other and from the exteriority, a unity that his body cannot master”. Mother gives him an answer by naming him: “That is you, there”, referring to his body and not to the reflection of this body in the mirror: The Other – usually the child’s mother – is called to be a symbolic guarantor and what is asked of her is this guarantee of recognition.
雅克·拉康在他1949年题为“镜像阶段犹如‘我’的功能之形成即是在精神分析经验中所揭示的那个功能”的论文中,说明意象是在欲望主体形成中的统一机构。对这一刻而言,最初的他者(在这一情况下是母亲)的存在十分重要。拉康表明,当婴儿在母亲胳臂里认出镜子里面的他自己,这一刻他转过身注视被照出的环境并表现出他的欢腾。这一欢愉在儿童感知到的外部整体自然中有其由来。“孩子在与他者的交谈(演讲,交流)中从外部发现一个他的身体所不能把握的整体”。母亲通过对他命名给他一个答案:“那是你,在那儿”,指着他的身体而不是这个身体在镜子中的反射:他者——通常是孩子的母亲——被称呼以成为一个象征担保人,关于她所被问到的是对认识的这一保证。
31. However, during adolescence, this Other is emptied of the figures that have guaranteed the child’s sense of his existence (parents, relatives). Friends and the group are now a haven set against this void.
然而,在青春期期间,这一他者被倒空了曾经保证儿童存在感的形象(父母,亲戚)。朋友和团体如今是针对这一空白的避难所集合。
32. We can say that adolescence is a time when a new relationship to the body, to others, to sexuality and to death is established. In his article about “the transformations of puberty” (in “Three Essays on Sexuality”), Freud indicates that, I quote: “ the finding of an object is in fact a refinding of it”. The construction of the adolescent I – just like the construction of the child’s I – is inseparable from the question of the relation of the subject to objects. The first infantile objects (paternal, maternal or fraternal love objects) will be, in adolescence, objects proposed by the social reality. Those infantile love objects have now been lost. Faced with this loss, the adolescent will need to find them again, will need to reconstruct an object, he will need to find it “again”.
我们可以说,青春期是一个时期,这时对身体,对他者,对性欲和对死亡的一个新的关系建立起来。弗洛伊德在他关于“身体发育的转化”(在“性学三论”中)一文中指出:“对客体的发现实际是对它的重新发现”。青少年我的结构——正如儿童我的结构一样——同主体与客体关系的问题形影不离。婴儿的第一个客体(父亲般的,母亲般的或兄弟般的爱的客体)在青春期会成为由社会现实所提倡的客体。那些婴儿期爱的客体如今失去了。面临这一丧失,青少年会需要再次找到它们,将需要重新构建一个客体,他会需要“再度”找到它。
33. In our modern societies, “consumer objects” – and we know how particularly fond of them adolescents are – are among the most important signs of the value of an individual. Everything seems to point towards giving an exorbitant value to appearance – the “look”. We see this very clearly in the instance of clothes. We must understand that clothes have become an affirmation of the I.
在我们现代社会中,“消费客体”——我们知道青少年尤其多么钟爱它们——属于一个个体价值最重要的标志。一切似乎指向给予外观——“外表”一个过高的意义。我们在衣服的例子中非常清晰地看到这一点。我们必须理解衣服已经成为对“我”的一个肯定。
34. One of my patients comes to mind. This is a young female, 14 years old, who arrived at my office looking like a “Goth” (black clothes, black nails, piercing, black makeup, etc). I noticed that she observed me closely; she wanted to read on my face the effect she had had on me. I remained impassive and she talked about the way in which her peers look at her. She draws the attention of her peers by way of rejection. She hopes to re-create a more individual “look”, looking forward to the gaze from the Other. “This is a style” she tells me; “I know that people look at me. I take a long time in the morning to get dressed. It is vital that I achieve a spotless image”.
我想起我的一个病人。这是个年轻的女性,14岁,她来到我的办公室,看起来像一个“哥特人”(黑衣服,黑指甲,耳朵穿洞,黑粉底,等等)。我注意到她很仔细地观察我;她想要在我脸上读到她对我的影响。我保持无动于衷,她谈论起她的同伴看她的方式。她通过拒绝引起同伴注意。她希望重塑一个更个体化的“样子”期待来自他者的注视。“这是一个风格。”她告诉我,“我知道人们看着我。我在早上花很长时间穿好衣服。我获得一个纯洁无暇的形象,这至关重要。”
(待续)